By Dr. Bunny Vreeland

Latest scientific research shows that we can lower blood cholesterol, lower blood pressure, lower cortisol levels, and reduce risks of cancer, heart disease, kidney disease, diabetes and live longer. How, you ask? Simply by making a few lifestyle changes. Hypnosis can help make those changes easier.

Since it is your intention to grow younger and live longer, the most important thing you can do is to think younger.

Your mind controls your body … Your body mirrors your thoughts … it has no choice … Your mind, a field a thoughts and ideas … are the sole influence over the energy molecules in your body … and therefore a young mind will help you to transform your body into a younger

looking body …

In my ANTI-AGING Hypnotherapy sessions, I’m going to show you some very advanced tools you can use to slow down the rate at which you age. The more slowly you age, the more youthful you remain. This cannot only extend your life but also save you from suffering from “old age” disease and disability. It will also help you look and feel years younger.

When I talk on Anti-aging, I have learned to clarify one thing first. Anti-aging is not the same thing as life extension. Aging is the process by which you gradually weaken and lose function. Anti-aging seeks to understand this process and intervene to preserve youthful characteristics.

Welcome to my Eight Life Changing, Anti Aging Sessions:

• Hyperthyroidism, or an overactive thyroid gland
• Liver disease
• Inadequate absorption of nutrients from the intestines
• Malnutrition
• Poor metabolism
• Compromised health

• Formation and maintenance of cell membranes (essential for life).
• Formation of sex hormones (progesterone, testosterone, estradiol and cortisol).
• Production of bile salts, which help to digest food.
• Conversion into vitamin D in the skin when exposed to sunlight.

1. Have a comprehensive lipid panel which includes cholesterol, LDL (buoyant and dense), HDL (HDL 2B), C-Reactive Protein, VLDL, homocysteine, and insulin.
2. Test your red blood cell fatty acids. The Kennedy Krieger Institute — Johns Hopkins University is the premier fatty acid testing laboratory in the world.

• Consume a diet of pure fats and oils. Support the health of your cell membrane with pure, unprocessed, organic oils in your diet. Liberal use of seeds, nuts, cold pressed fats, and oils is highly recommended with reduction of carbohydrate intake. Organic butter, cream, meat fats, and eggs contain essential fats and should be included in your diet. To cook foods at high temperatures such as when stir-frying or sautéing food, use coconut butter, avocado, or olive oil.
• Eliminate all chemically processed oils/fats. Partially hydrogenated or trans fats are toxic to the liver and brain, cause high cholesterol (LDL) and contribute to such difficulties such as fatigue, toxicity, neurodegenerative disorders, aging, hyperactivity, learning disabilities, mood disorders, immune abnormalities and cardiovascular disease. Essential fats found in pure, unprocessed fats and oils are crucial to all cellular function. Processed fats and oils must be completely avoided ― margarine, vegetable oil, canola oil, peanut butter, Crisco, commercial mayonnaise (Hellman’s, Miracle whip) and salad dressing.
• Eat certified organically-grown foods. At this time in history, we are under the greatest of pressures. Literally thousands of harmful chemicals are in the food, air, and water. Pesticides, herbicides, endocrine disruptors, dyes, chemicals, antibiotics, heavy metals, and hormone residues contaminate the food supply. Avoidance is the best way to protect yourself and your family from harmful toxins.
• Eat whole foods. Processed foods are manipulated and changed in a way to extend the shelf life of the food. They are less nutritious as many vitamins and nutrients are lost in the process. Stay as close to nature as possible in eating. If the bugs won’t eat it, we shouldn’t either.
• Eat pasture-raised meats, free range poultry/eggs and wild ocean fish. www.eatwild.com and www.themeatrix.com are good resources. Avoid farm-raised fish which are fed an unnatural diet of corn, soy, dog food and wastes and do not have the essential fats found in ocean fish. Fish to be consumed include wild Alaskan salmon and small body fish such as sardines. Obtain salmon, halibut, and tuna that are safe to consume from www.vitalchoice.com.

by  Sherry Gaba 

You may be a single woman by choice, a single parent, a single woman who has just been dumped or has done the dumping, or just someone that enjoys being a singleton. Whatever your circumstances are, being single is a time to celebrate and honor who you right at this very moment. It is a time to honor all of the opportunities that await you such as finding who your authentic self is. That’s right, take the mask off and enter the place of the un-known without being in fear. Only the un-known offers us infinite possibilities for future love if that’s what you want or maybe a trip to India, or perhaps taking that yoga class you keep putting off. Anything and everything is possible when you are single. Here are the 10 reasons why being single can be satisfying.

1.      It is a time to be true to yourself and find out what really fulfills you. What is it that you really value and want out of your life?

2.      It is a time to find out why you are here and what is your life purpose? What are you here to do on this planet and what is it that is meaningful to you?

3.      It is a time where you have control over what you do and how you do it. There is no one looking over your shoulder telling you how to spend your money or where to take a vacation. You are on your own, and you can go anywhere your heart desires.

4.      It is a time to develop yourself spiritually and take a look at your unique spiritual nature. You get to ask those existential questions such as what is a higher power. Is there something outside and separate from myself that is a silent witness to my life as it unfolds?

5.      It is a time to figure out what it is I really want out of an intimate relationship? What is it I contribute to relationship? What is the nature and quality of the relationship I desire? What are the deal breakers in what is acceptable and unacceptable in a partner? You get to do the choosing rather than always waiting to be chosen.

6.      It is a time to build your community and support. Invite someone for coffee, dinner, a walk, or a talk. Having a network of friends can be one of the most nurturing things you can do for yourself?

7.      You get to dine wherever and whenever you want? You don’t have to cook for anyone or eat some strange type of delicacy just to please your partner. 

8.      You get to say NO NO NO and set clear boundaries for yourself. When you establish healthy boundaries, your self esteem sky rockets and you develop safety and trust in yourself and others because no one can overstep the boundaries you have created for yourself.

9.      You learn how to be present in the moment without judging yourself or others harshly. You become consciously aware of the preciousness of each moment enjoying your sacred alones with complete joy and freedom.

10.   You are accountable to no one but yourself. Once you learn to count on you, the possibilities are endless.

Being single is about reframing and redefining what being alone means. You no longer have to play victim to your singleness. If you are looking for true love, it magically comes to you without any effort because you radiate confidence, self assurance without neediness or desperation. This can be the time of your life if you believe it is…..re-discover the joyous space between what you   were, what you are now, and what you are becoming.

To Soy or Not to Soy?

Soy and Hormones
Soy contains phytoestrogens, similar in structure to naturally-produced estrogen hormones. Bonnie Tromello, nurse practitioner of Crossroads in Health states, “The phytoestrogens in soy can help to reduce menopausal symptoms.” Tromello also explains, “There are more harmful phytoestrogens found in the environment than the phytoestrogens found in soy. Because the phytoestrogens mimic estrogen, they bind to the same receptor site, preventing the more harmful phytoestrogens from binding to that site.” In her own practice, Tromello finds that women who consume moderate amounts of soy have less breast tissue change and a reduction of breast density. A lower breast density enables doctors to read mammograms and detect tumors more clearly.

According to Dr. Williams, “Ingesting large amounts of soy may affect testosterone levels in men. The lowering of testosterone levels may have many affects on their bodies. Some possibilities are weight gain, lower sperm count, lack of sex drive, and erectile dysfunction.” To maintain healthy testosterone levels it is recommended that men avoid consuming large amounts of soy, especially after the age of 30 when testosterone levels in men lower naturally.

“Birth Control Pills for Babies” is the subtitle Sally Fallon and Mary Eing, PhD, authors of Tragedy and Hype, chose to explain the effects of soy formula on infants. The title is shocking and the facts backing it may appear equally so. “In 1998, investigators reported that the daily exposure of infants to isoflavones (which are phytoestrogens) in soy infant formula is six to 11 times higher on a body weight basis than the dose resulting in hormonal effects in adults consuming soy foods. … An infant exclusively fed soy formula receives the estrogenic equivalent of at least five birth control pills per day,” (Fallon and Eing, 2000).

When choosing infant formula for your little tyke, understand that numerous studies suggest babies given breast milk have significant health advantages compared to those given any type of formula. “There is absolutely no question that breastfeeding is more beneficial,” says Tromello. If your infant is allergic to dairy and breastfeeding is not an option, Dr. Williams recommends to “investigate whether or not the soy component of the formula was fermented or not.”

Cholesterol

Regarding the relationship between soy protein and lower LDL-cholesterol levels, the FDA states there are “significant reductions of total LDL-cholesterol levels in controlled trials that used at least 25 grams of soy protein per day,” as stated on the FDA’s website, www.FDA.gov.

The FDA also suggests in addition to the 25 grams of soy protein, a diet low in saturated fat and cholesterol may reduce the risk of heart disease. However, the friendly relationship the FDA has with the soy industry is no secret. While the high amounts of omega-3 fatty acids found in soy contribute to lowering cholesterol, it is still important to weigh all the pros and cons. There are other natural ways to lower cholesterol such as increasing fruit and vegetable, fiber and whole grain intake.

The Bottom Line
More money is being invested in marketing soy. Soy farmers are being encouraged to take part in The National Soybean Promotion, Research, and Consumer Information Act and Order. The Act states, “The program’s goal is to strengthen the position of soybeans in the marketplace and to maintain and expand domestic and foreign markets and uses for soybeans and soybean products,” according to the website www.soycheckoff.com. Funded by a mandatory assessment of 0.5 of 1 percent of the net market price of soybeans, the total funds for 2008 exceeded $140 million.

The program defines research in section 1967 of the act as “any type of study to advance the image, desirability, marketability, production, product development, quality, or functional or nutritional value of soybeans or soybean products.” However, in their definition there is no mention of clinical research.

Just like everything else we decide to put into our bodies, it is important to know the facts to determine the best option for ourselves. In Tromello’s opinion, “Soy is fine in moderation. It is better to choose whole soy foods and to avoid processed soy foods. And as always, when you can, buy organic.”

For soy alternatives and more information, visit www.eatingwithfoodallergies.com and www.allergyfreeshop.com

Only recently has Western medicine begun to realize the role that emotions play in health.  In the past, the belief was that the immune system regulates itself, responsive only to the battle between antigens and immune cells.  Research has now established that anger, anxiety, grief, fear, depression and other psychological processes directly influence the body’s immune system.  All of these emotions work together to create what is arguably the primary cause of immune deficiency in the modern world  STRESS. 

Everyone experiences stress.  The human body is equipped to deal with stressors that require a fight or flight response, where heart rate accelerates, blood flow to muscle increases and production of adrenaline and other powerful hormones rise.  When the stressful situation is over, the body naturally recovers its energy and endocrine balance.  On a short-term basis, this type of stress is often considered a good thing, affecting the body as much as exercise does.  In today’s society, however, stress has become a chronic issue – it never seems to go away.  The body is not well equipped to handle stress on a continuous basis, and the immune system suffers as a result. 

Many factors contribute to chronic stress, including frustration with career, being overworked on underworked, marital strife, financial problems, bad news on television, peer pressures, issues with children or the hazards of modern life.  The list could go on and on.  These are not isolated experiences, and they are working together continuously.  The accepted response to stress is for a person to repress rage, fear, frustration and other negative emotions provoked by stressful situations.  One is thereby failing to utilize the powerful hormones and aneurochemicals released into the blood. 

These potent biochemicals quickly break down into various toxic byproducts that poison the system, suppress immunity and impede other vital functions.  Under sustained stress, the body never has a chance to excrete these toxins thoroughly and restore proper balance to the body.  Sleep is often disrupted which further compromises the system.  Drugs, whether in the form of painkillers, sleep aids, anti-depressants, alcohol or illegal drugs, are sometimes taken to alleviate stress.  These also contribute to the decline of immune system function.  Now the body is even less able to handle the invasion of yeast, viruses, bacteria and parasites that come our way, due to the inability of the body’s defense system to ward off these antigens.  Chronic or serious health problems result, which then contribute to an increase in the stress level.  A vicious cycle has developed. 

For more information on anti-stress body treatments and programs contact The Body Sanctuary at 805.230.0010.

In a healthy body this system of checks and balances works very well to maintain health and ward off invaders.  However, when the immune system is weakened over time, it becomes unable to destroy the viruses, bacteria and toxic chemicals that invade the body,  Infections become more frequent, and there is a greater likelihood of health problems ranging from minor illness to cancer.  The body’s protection has become inadequate. 

The conditions causing a weakened immune system are cumulative.  Although health often seems to deteriorate quickly, disease doesn’t happen overnight due to the “sudden attack” of a bacteria or virus.  There may be some predisposing factors beyond the control of a person, but in most cases, it is the collective effects of a person’s lifestyle that bring about illness.  Health-destroying conditions are allowed to go on for prolonged periods of time, either by the choices that we make or the choices that we allow others to make for us.  This long-term abuse comes in the form of the foods we eat, the drugs we take, and other emotional and environmental factors that are a part of our lives.  These abuses all work in combination to compromise the immune system, resulting in illness and disease. In order to start to get well, the first step is to cleanse the body through Detoxification. 

This is accomplished through a total body cleansing program, which cleans the liver, bowels, kidneys, and the blood supply.  It helps restore the peristaltic action of the colon, and helps to rid the body of mucus, toxins and waste materials that are trapped in the colon (and may have been there for years).  The cleanse is achieved through a three-day program that will replace the normal diet and clean the body systems.  This is the way to treat degenerative symptoms without drugs or chemicals and begin walking on the path to health. 

For more information on Detoxification and Wellness Programs contact The Body Sanctuary at 805.230.0010   850 Hampshire Rd Suite P, Westlake Village

Sherry Gaba, Licensed Psychotherapist and Life Coach

A male client tells his psychotherapist he is having difficulty turning his neck from side to side without experiencing excruciating pain.  Another female client reacts to a new relationship, which on the surface looks and feels good, but when her partner speaks in a certain tone to her; she feels a sense of dread in her gut.  Another client comes in carrying a baby blanket to help her feel safe from a flood of emotions too painful to ignore, but too difficult to express.  What all these clients seem to be exhibiting is a history of un-resolved trauma and emotional pain that is so debilitating, it can only be felt in their bodies, but cannot be expressed verbally.  In these types of cases, psychotherapy that accesses the bodies felt senses may be the best treatment to un-earth these chronic symptoms that many suffer from in the aftermath of intense trauma and emotional pain.  Some of these treatments include Somatic Experiencing, Whole Body Consciousness, or Psychodrama.

The different types of trauma can come from a host of past experiences such as childhood neglect or abandonment, physical, sexual, or verbal abuse, an auto accident, a divorce, a sudden death of a loved one, or even a natural disaster such as an earthquake.  Although these clients may not be able to verbalize their pain, their bodies speak for themselves.  There is a knowing that something doesn’t feel quite right.  Some of these symptoms show up later as an increased heart rate, sweating, trouble breathing, muscular tension, chronic fatigue, digestive problems, depression, or anxiety.   Some of the ways people deal with these traumatic pasts are to numb out, freeze, disassociate, or even go into denial.  This is the body’s way of protecting itself from traumatic experiences that were too severe to have been endured at the time they happened.  For example, many sexually abused individuals report an “out of body” experience when perpetuated by the abuser.  It is as if their body is there, but their mind disappears so as not to have to feel the emotional pain of the abuse.  If these body messages are not dealt with, many trauma victims turn to other ways to self soothe or self-medicate such as addictions to food, sex, drugs, alcohol, spending,  self-mutilation, and other self defeating behaviors.

 Other symptoms of un-resolved trauma can stay underground for years and suddenly a major stressor erupts, and a person develops panic attacks or a feeling of being detached or dead inside. 

When a person is threatened, the body stores energy to help defend against the danger, however, when the energy is not discharged properly at the time of the event, it becomes blocked in the body only to show up later when there is a life altering event in a person’s life. This is when it usually shows up as anxiety, panic attacks, or even phobias such as fear of flying or fear of driving on freeways.

Other examples of symptoms that occur when un-resolved emotional pain is not dealt with might be denial where a person acts as if an intolerable event never occurred or he or she might be drawn to situations that replicate the original childhood trauma.  For example, a person chooses a partner that is an alcoholic similar to an alcoholic parent from his or her family of origin. This type of behavior is a person’s way of unconsciously re-doing the past to get it right.  In other words, it is a coping mechanism people use to deal with un-resolved emotional pain that has not been processed. 

When unresolved trauma is not worked through, individuals have difficulty setting boundaries.  When a person goes through a major traumatic event, he or she becomes disconnected from his or her body.  Therefore, he or she doesn’t know where boundaries begin or where they end.  They might let others take advantage of them because they do not know how to say “no” or become extremely co-dependent in their relationships.

The goal of body psychotherapy is to be able to begin to correlate thoughts with body sensations.  By being able to make the connection, a person learns not to respond in the usual habitual ways.  For instance, when you are triggered by a boss or a loved one, you become aware of the body sensations that are being effected and can respond appropriately versus impulsively.

There are various therapeutic methods to track the felt senses in the body.  One way to heal trapped energy or past emotional pain is to become present to your bodies sensations by noticing the subtle changes that occur when you are upset or when you feel joy.

“In somatic experiencing you initiate your own healing by re-integrating lost or fragmented positions of your essential self.” (Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma, Peter A. Levine, 1997).  This is a method by which the psychotherapist helps the client access the felt senses in the body when he shares both difficult material from the past, as well as experiences that are pleasant.

As we develop, we learn to disconnect from our body awareness through the socialization processes.  We learn to role model from parents, teachers, and other authority figures that teach us what is right and wrong.  When we begin to explore the world around us, we are told to “sit down” or “be still” when what we should be doing is exploring our environments with a sense of curiosity and excitement.  These messages encourage us to shut down losing touch with the energy force that lies within us.

“The gap between body and mind stems from programming that encourages us to be quiet and repress our feelings in the interest of being stoic and well behaved.” (What’s your body telling you? Listening to your body’s signals to stop anxiety, erase self-doubt, and achieve true wellness, Steve Sisgold, 2009).

Some examples of whole body consciousness are learning how to deep breathe, scanning the whole body for changes and witnessing the sensation as they move, meditation, or learning how to alter body positions. 

When you expand your chest, you are more likely to access uplifting and positive thoughts versus shrinking your shoulders which represents a negative thought process.  In meditation, you learn to be a curious observer of your thoughts instead of trying to control them. You learn how to regulate your reactions towards yourself, others, and situations instead of acting out inappropriately.  Suddenly your relationships improve because you are no longer a victim of un-processed trauma where energy has been stagnated, but rather the energy now flows more freely and smoothly and your reactions come from a more balanced and mindful place.  You begin to be able to cope with un-comfortable situations in a more peaceful fashion making decisions from a grounded position versus not thinking things through.

Another type of body psychotherapy is psychodrama which is a type of role play that allows individuals to rework relationships with others and with themselves.  It is a way to correct distorted views of how they might have seen others.  This is done through role reversal by putting themselves in another person’s position. It allows them to feel re-empowered and restore a sense of safety where they might have felt helpless in the past.  It allows individuals to see how others might be viewing them by receiving feedback so they can change self-destructive behavior patterns.  

Finally, when you learn to access your body’s innate wisdom and investigate emotions that have been repressed, you get the opportunity to un-leash un-tapped energy so that you can move more freely and easily.  By releasing deep seated pain and old wounds, you begin to feel empowered and nothing or no one will be able to hold you back from being the creative, resourceful, and brilliant person you are meant to be. 

Sherry Gaba, LCSW, is a Licensed Psychotherapist and Life Coach in Agoura.  She specializes in addictions, trauma, divorce, single parenting, mindfulness skills, and somatic experiencing.  She is the Psychotherapist on Celebrity Rehab 2 and 3 with Dr. Drew Pinsky on VH1, as well as a contributing author to the “Conscious Entrepreneur” and “Chicken Soup for the Soul: Tough Times, Tough People.”  She can be reached at 818-756-3338 or This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it , www.sgabatherapy.com.   

WATCH YOUR THOUGHTS; THEY BECOME WORDS.
WATCH YOUR WORDS; THEY BECOME ACTIONS.
WATCH YOUR ACTIONS; THEY BECOME HABITS.
WATCH YOUR HABITS; THEY BECOME CHARACTER.
WATCH YOUR CHARACTER; IT BECOMES YOUR DESTINY.

• Avoid eating in front of the TV or while busy with other activities.
• Pay attention to what you are eating and fully enjoy the smell and taste of your foods.
• Eat slowly so your brain can get the message that your stomach is full.
• Take seconds of vegetables or salads instead of meats or desserts.
• Try to eat three sensible meals at regular times throughout the day.
• Skipping meals may lead you to eat larger portions at your next meal.

Practical Parenting Tips

originally published in the Acorn

By Sylvie Belmond This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

Today's parents must simultaneously juggle numerous responsibilities on several fronts to meet the emotional and physical needs of their families, said Bette Alkazian, a licensed marriage and family therapist and parenting coach who owns a practice in Thousand Oaks.

However, if parents manage to preserve stability most of the time, they'll be able to regain balance when special challenges arise, said Alkazian as she provided a series of helpful tips to a group of about 20 parents at a recent workshop hosted by the Moorpark Council ParentTeacher Association.

Parents often have the unreasonable expectation that they should be perfect all of the time, but that's not feasible, according to Alkazian. "We're all learning, growing and developing, just like our kids, so go easy on yourself and do your best to do your best. Your kids will forgive you along the way if you learn to be forgiving of yourself," she said. "Be intentional about your parenting; decide who you want your children to be and parent backwards," the therapist said to an attentive audience.

Parents should have a vision of who they hope their kids become and then educate them and model for them those skills and values they want to instill, she said. It's important to model good problem-solving skills in order to raise well-rounded individuals who are capable of handling the challenges of adult life, she said. This is also true for other behaviors. "Be who you want them to be. If you want your child to be compassionate, be compassionate yourself," she said.

To instill honesty, parents can't bribe or lie to their children, said Alkazian, encouraging parents to tell the truth despite probable disappointments. Sometimes parents must learn to tolerate the discomfort of their children to help them grow and mature into balanced adults that can deal with hardship and failure in a healthy way. "You have to be strong to tolerate your child's discomfort," said Alkazian.
This process starts early on. When babies don't want to go to sleep, they may have to be left alone to cry it ou for a while, and eventually the infant will learn to be self reliant and go to sleep on his or her own without fuss.

When children are older, parents have to learn to accept opposition as they set appropriate limits. "The wrath of a 16yearold can be brutal, but you still have to say no," she said. Additionally, teenagers are more likely to accept and follow the rules if families have consistent expectations and guidelines, said Alkazian, who has three daughters between the ages of 7 and 16.  Kids also need unconditional love, attention, purpose and respect. They thrive when parents bring their best selves to their marriage because a good relationship between spouses creates the foundation for a healthy family and a stable environment, she said.

Even as parenting can be difficult, parents should try to infuse laughter and humor into the daily routine to instill optimism. Alkazian provided good insights about modern parenting, said Michelle Dearman, a PTA Council vice-president and mother of three children ages 11 and under. "She provided solutions on how to make parenting work in today's society," she said. In previous generations, parents mostly had to just make sure that their children were fed and safe, but now they have to be intentional and think about the impacts that their parenting style has on their kids because there are many things out there
to influence children, she said.

As a mother, Alkazian can relate to what parents have to go through because she's experiencing the challenges and rewards of parenting herself, Dearman said.

For more information about Alkazian, visit Balanced Parenting

LIFE COACHES PROVIDE ALTERNATIVES TO THERAPY

A woman is depressed and anxious following a recent divorce; another is more hopeful in the aftermath of her split and wants to move on with her life. Should these women see a therapist or a life coach, or perhaps both?

In former days, such topics were primarily the purview of the church or synagogue. But with advances in the field of psychotherapy, women's options grew. While psychotherapy must follow certain guidelines from state to state, life coaching can be facilitated anywhere. Life coaching can keep individuals and employees motivated and accountable and help them find a more fulfilling and purposeful life.

Life coaches and therapists serve different purposes. The therapist is the person who is sought out for the healing of old wounds and the discussion of personal problems that need to be analyzed and solved. The life coach, on the other hand, is both mentor and guide.

"So much therapy is about the past and present and all about focusing the client toward healing. Coaching, on the other hand, is about helping a client look forward to expand their options and to take action," according to Leslie Lupinsky, a master certified coach.

Getting better every day
Life coaching is not so much about fixing a problem but rather helping a client escape their comfort zone. It is about the creation of a future self.

A life coach starts with the assumption that a client is already whole.

"I love coactive coaching because I am dancing in the moment now," said Hozhoin Healing Arts' Pati Maez, a co-active coach.

To select coaching means to consciously choose a preferred future and live life to its fullest. As Maez tells her clients, "Go be the best that you are now."

Coaching does not focus on what needs mending but clarifies what the client wants to improve upon, whether it is their career, their relationship, their health or their spirituality.

Leslie Gail, a life coach and owner of New Life Focus Coaching, acknowledges that "If you are committed to making some life changes but need guidance and information to make it a reality, then working with a life coach is your best bet."

Coaches ask clients what they really want out of life. They see coaching as an alliance between the coach and client, with the belief that there's a partnership of equals in the process of coaching. Life coaches use the "co-active" model, which states that a client is already a naturally creative and resourceful whole.

Gary Yoon, a life coach client, said, "Coaching demands us to be the person we were created to be, not just for ourselves but for others as well. When we hide that part of ourselves, others can't benefit from the beautiful gifts and talents we already have."

Another client, Mary Copek, used coaching to help her cope with grief after her husband's sudden death.

"I truly wanted to grieve as necessary but to balance that right from the start with a positive plan for my future," Copek said.

"Coaching allowed me the freedom to cry and even in the same breath consider the new opportunities that lay before me."

In essence, there's room for both life coaching and psychotherapy. When issues are more serious or are out of a coach's scope of practice, a life coach will refer a client for outside psychotherapy.

Psychotherapists are highly trained to deal with mental illness, thoughts of suicide, addictions, abuse and other difficult problems. A client in these circumstances needs proper evaluation and treatment.
Psychotherapy is about eliminating problems and making changes in order to live a more functional life.

Life coaching focuses on the beauty that already lies within.